The human-animal bond is very strong. They comfort us, protect us and live for us. We in return, have dog metaphors throughout our language. Just think about all the ways the four-legged canine animal came into our language. The word dog can be used with business, dance, failure, finance, follow, friend, horse racing, latch, lumbering, man, private parts, feet, transportation or as a verb. The alpha male is the leader of the pack, but if I can’t teach him to heel, he will spend considerable time in the dog house especially if he is not house trained. If he doesn’t step in it, he might get to stay in the pup tent otherwise it might be to the dog pound. But work like a dog, because everyone knows you can’t teach a dog new tricks and if you don’t have a job you may become a booze hound. I have a bone to pick which can lead to a bone of contention but don’t bite the hand that feeds you. But if you do throw the dog a bone, you might find it is a dog eat dog world because people act like a dog with a bone and sometimes they just fight like cats and dogs. Or are they just nipping at your heels, because they don’t have a dog in this fight? A dog’s bark is worse than his bite, but he is not a lap dog and if you don’t put a muzzle on it, it could lead to a real dogfight. So keep them on a short leash or better yet, call off the dogs. And anyway, who, who let the dogs out? He missed the dogleg in the trail, so he is barking up the wrong tree, but he still has to jump through hoops because he is not as lucky as a dog.

In a bird dog minute you can be a dog’s age-old and sick as a dog then you die like a dog because it is a dog’s life. Maybe you can just play dead. Regardless it is not over until the last dog dies. Every dog has his day and every day has dog especially in the dog days of August. But if you do die, make sure you have your dog tags.

Remember to take a doggie bag for the dog’s breakfast or the dog’s dinner or are you just eating your own dog food when you really prefer to eat a hot dog. If you had a hangdog or dogface expression, you would not say “hotdoggity dog.” If you were pretty as a speckled pup you might wear a poodle skirt and get Orion’s dog star named after you.

This really just sounds like a dog and pony show, so put on the dog. But don’t send the dog catcher after the dog wagon. Kids use the excuse that the dog ate their homework, so they have time for puppy love. And it is okay because, on the internet, nobody knows you’re a dog. Adult versions have to do with female dogs, body parts, styles and probably more I really don’t want to know about. My favorite this Friday afternoon of an “interesting” week comes because I do not have a leash and cannot be kept on a leash, so “don’t whiz on my leg and tell me it’s raining.”

Don’t think I am hotdogging it, because much of the information for this article came from